If Valentines Day Cards told the Truth

I got this from my friend....who was recently jilted by his fiance.

If Valentine's Day Cards Told The Truth
By CRACKED Readers

Men and women tell each other that honesty is the most important part of a relationship, which is itself a lie. Men want their wife to tell them she's never been with a lover who rocked her world quite so violently. Women want their husband to tell them ... whatever the hell it is women want to hear.

We asked you to use our article from a few years back as inspiration, and show us what Valentine's Day Cards would look like if they were actually honest.