Nerdgasm Revisited

I seem to be somewhat focused on scientific discovery recently. I just wanted to provide an update on the geek situation. This week, I have had the opportunity to descend into the depths of a geek stronghold. I've seen a couple of men that would fall into the hot geek potential category. But there are more than just hot geeks there. I've discovered a cute boy next door type, a sexy player, and the entrancing alternative guy. But there are also horrors lurking, horrors that I had managed to block. Yes, they have nerds.

Nerds and geeks are very different. Geeks have obscure interests that border on nerd territory, but still manage to keep it together, have some social skills, and not manage to grate your nerves like nails on a chalkboard. The nerds are the pretentious, overbearing, socially retarded types that are completely oblivious to almost everything.

I don't know if it is just me, or if every teacher experiences this kind of weird draw for the nerds. They wait for me after class, just so they can talk to me a little longer. They tell me about their interests, recommend books, TV shows, and anime. They are really nice generally. It's so heart-breaking to meet them and know that they are good and decent people but they somehow are so oblivious to simple social behaviors that they have a difficult time. And even though I understand them, I still want to get as far away as quickly as possible.

A message for the nerds: there is hope. All it takes is finding someone to teach you how to relate to other people, and perhaps work on the clothes. That's it. Maybe we should start some kind of nerd rehab. Take the nerds, teach them to talk without sounding like the Comic Book Guy from "The Simpsons" and put them in some GAP-issued standard IT geek uniform. It's a slight adjustment.

Plus, think about the surge in the hot geek population. It's a win-win.

Nerdgasm

Earlier today, in the big brother sanctioned smoking area, which is a weird 6x4x10x9 trapezoidal area, a guy gave my friend advice about a wireless router. Cute, wiry, wearing glasses and the nerd uniform of white button up and khakis. I assumed he was in IT, a place I try to stay away from for I have an unhealthy attraction to geeks.

I came into the breakroom, and there he was, working on a laptop and entranced by CNN. Mmm. Brainy and geeky and hot. Just like I like them. It's a mostly harmless fascination, but it does lead to some interesting side effects when listening to geek talk that would bore most women. I generally have very little idea of what they are talking about, but I'm picturing something else entirely.

It's nothing like the Savage Love podcast I heard today about the woman who had a grammar fetish. Interesting words were her fetish. And while I love words, I don't LOVE words, you know? She started talking about the words that turned her on, and it was pretty pornographic. Dan Savage accused her of masturbating in her call, the words so obviously did it for her. It was interesting to me, the mental switches that people have that can lead to enhanced sexual excitement.

I don't think geeks, as sexy as they are, are that thing for me. It makes me want to experiment and find one. Purely in the interest of science.