Nerdgasm

Earlier today, in the big brother sanctioned smoking area, which is a weird 6x4x10x9 trapezoidal area, a guy gave my friend advice about a wireless router. Cute, wiry, wearing glasses and the nerd uniform of white button up and khakis. I assumed he was in IT, a place I try to stay away from for I have an unhealthy attraction to geeks.

I came into the breakroom, and there he was, working on a laptop and entranced by CNN. Mmm. Brainy and geeky and hot. Just like I like them. It's a mostly harmless fascination, but it does lead to some interesting side effects when listening to geek talk that would bore most women. I generally have very little idea of what they are talking about, but I'm picturing something else entirely.

It's nothing like the Savage Love podcast I heard today about the woman who had a grammar fetish. Interesting words were her fetish. And while I love words, I don't LOVE words, you know? She started talking about the words that turned her on, and it was pretty pornographic. Dan Savage accused her of masturbating in her call, the words so obviously did it for her. It was interesting to me, the mental switches that people have that can lead to enhanced sexual excitement.

I don't think geeks, as sexy as they are, are that thing for me. It makes me want to experiment and find one. Purely in the interest of science.

This just in, apparently Michael Phelps has been elevated to the status of male perfection

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/earth/main.jhtml?view=DETAILS&grid=&xml=/earth/2008/08/18/scisexy118.xml

I was skeptical of this article that states that short women with long legs are the most attractive. Since I'm a tall woman with long legs, I have some reasons to doubt it. But then I remembered that Cotton Candy fits that description, so I'll accept it as scientifically valid.

What I don't understand is how Michael Phelps relates to this at all. He may exhibit the build they are talking about, but damn, they leave very little to the imagination. Whoever wrote this article wants to have his baby, or at the very least, wants them a little taste of Mr. Phelps.

Ok, they do finally get down to the science, but I think someone would rather get down with a certain Olympic swimmer. For those of you that want to know, they key to being attractive is to be symmetrical. So if you can make that happen, you're in. And of course, remember that men like boobies. Science is amazing.