Tuesday, August 12, 2008

Ink Cartidges, Inc.

by Amy O.

Ink cartridges, Paper and Binders don’t just appear. It takes a lot of effort to get these things from the various people and move them. When I go to the supply cabinet, I expect to see at least one of the 30 white binders I carried over from Linda’s area or from the front office. When I open the cabinet and see ZERO white folders, I wonder where all of them disappeared…then I look around and I see them on your desks...hum...so, I keep my own supply at my desk. You can figure out where to haul them from...

Paper...wow, we have a whole drawer full of paper. I know sometimes I load the printer…but not all the time so I know some of you must load it, too. That leaves me to believe that you must open that drawer to retrieve it. When you retrieve it, you see when it gets low? Well, then go get a case of paper and reload it. Not hard…ask Pete, he has a dolly to go get more than one box. You don't have to lift anything and won't get injured and have to go to Medical. It is less thank 10 lb per ream of paper. You can count it for your fit for life.

Ink Cartridges...sometimes the Toner says "low"...don’t panic. You can still print. However, when it stops printing because it doesn’t have enough ink, again, don't panic. It's OK...not the end of the world. Don't act like as if you are incapacitated and won't be able to work. Go get a new cartridge of load it. I am sure I spend more money on my clothes than you do, so I take the chance when I put it in that I might get ink on me, too. You are not better than me and it is OK...take the chance...it might improve your look. You can do it without getting the toner on you…be careful and you, too can load the printer... OH, and you can recycle the toner, too. Just walk it over to the recycle bin. Don’t act stupid like you can't find it. You make it to your desk from that huge parking lot every day to your desk with all of my binders...so you can remember where that recycle bin is...

You wonder why I roll my eyes at you when you keep legal paper in the printer, too. Don't act like it is my fault that you loaded it and then didn't hit print and my charts got in front of yours...just shout out, "I am printing on legal" before...run to your desk and print...then when you are done, remove that ream of legal that was like an act of congress for me to find so the rest of us don't print on legal paper. We all share the color printer. Don't waste the ink and legal paper.

You wonder why the supply lady loves me and I get whatever supplies I need? Because I don’t ask for new keyboards, special ink cartridges and special mice...I work with what I have and then I ask nicely for new stuff. I think her tastes are great and she always gives me something new every time I go over there. I ask about it her grandchildren...she is hypnotized by my concern and gives me anything I want. She knows 9 times out of 10 you don't pick up the phone over here and I have to transfer her. She understands because she has to answer the phone...and feels my pain that you can’t stop for 30 seconds to answer the phone. She loves me, not you.

2 comments:

Erin Williams said...

Huh… see, if I were BFF with the supply lady, I would totally use my connection to get a new keyboard and mouse and stuff. Which reminds that I need some special sized Post-Its. In my office I’m buddy-buddy with office supply girl. We do happy hour and stuff. At times she kids about my not getting the office supplies I want, but really she is just kidding.

However, we did have a funny episode where it took 3 of us to figure out how to change the toner in the fax machine. Just goes to show you how popular email is these days. LOL

Freya said...

We’ve got our own office supply nazi. In character, she’s like that soviet bitch played by Cate Blanchett in the new Indiana Jones movie, The Crystal Skull. At least, what I assume about her character from the trailers. I haven’t seen it yet. This lady has a similar character and mean look on her face. I was warned when I came here that she guards the supplies jealously, and when you ask, it must be in an e-mail. She gets upset when you ask her in person. I don’t know why.

She is the department boss’s secretary, so she has the power. She’s informant, helpmeet, and distribution point for much of the evil around here. She has appointed herself the fashion police. This wouldn’t be such a terrible thing, because there are some gross fashion errors committed daily here (some probably by me). However, it is all about the dress code. They have this detailed dress code, outlawing most of the things people would want to wear. I can only assume that the point of this is to make us all believe and acknowledge the fact that we are a professional office, when most of us think we work in a call center. She likes to send out emails that have pictures, lest we forget what sleeveless shirts look like. It’s very helpful. Maybe I’ll get to post the next one. In case you girls need a reminder.